


Forgive and forget

by Melody hitachiin (Lolabug7)



Series: Valerie Bennett [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: BAMF OFC, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hydra (Marvel), I'm bad at tags, Love Triangle, Memory Loss, Smut, but kinda, not really - Freeform, tiny bit of crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-12
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-10-17 23:58:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10605030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lolabug7/pseuds/Melody%20hitachiin
Summary: This is the story of how Valerie Bennett, a beautiful young woman went missing two years after captain America died and how she's found just months after hydra collapsed.With her life back she must learn to adapt to the new world while she fights to help her new family.





	1. Who am I? What's my name?

**Author's Note:**

> I'm happy to say that I'm finally releasing this instead of just teasers.  
> I'm also happy to say that this was originally supposed to Be short but what ever. 
> 
> The first few chapters are short and written like a journal but that's not the whole story so if that bothers you don't worry. 
> 
> I'd also like to hear what you guys have to say about it and I look forward to reading your comments. 
> 
> Lastly I'm going to be posting every couple of weeks maybe even sooner since I've finished the first story in the series and just like to fuck you all over. :) 
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!!  
> \------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I guess I should start by saying I don't know who I am, or where I've been, or even why I've been living on the streets of New York.

It all started about a week ago.   
I woke up cold, so very cold. I was in a small container that felt like a freezer, it was dark and smelled sterile almost. when I finally broke out of the contraption I found myself even more confused.  I was in a rather large room, it was dark, dirty and looked like it had been abandoned many years ago.  The walls and ceiling had cracks and rubble missing that made them look like vines.  There were no windows and only a large, thick metal door that looked like it belonged to a bank vault.   
The only thing in the room was the little container thing that I had come out of and it stood out greatly. As the rest of the room was dirty and old, this contraption seemed brand new and squeaky clean.  As you made your way to the door I found it locked from the inside. Without questioning it much you just pulled the door open. You followed the long halls till you finally found my way out.  
And after that I began to seek shelter. Something kept telling me I was in danger and needed to hid.

I ended up finding a homeless shelter and had been staying there for a day or two till I felt unsafe again. People have been giving me money when I'm walking around during the day, I guess they feel bad for me. A lot of the stuff I see in stores as I go in doesn't seem familiar, it's almost like I've traveled into the future, I don't understand anything. 

Today I found this empty note book in the trash so I took it and began writing everything I do or know, in case I forget again. I like the idea of writing down everything I've done, i don't know how else to explain it other than it makes me feel real.   
I'll have to find another note book soon. This one says it has 200 pages, but I counted and it only has 80. That gives me some time to save up for a new one and some food. 

 

Entry two  
July 5th 2014 

People keep talking about this big thing that went down not long ago, something about the fall of shield and hydra? The words meant nothing to me but every time I think about hydra I get an unsettling feeling.  
This guy called captain America saved millions of people from getting killed. His name sounded so familiar. He was with this group of people called the avengers. They saved people and had their very own headquarters here in New York called stark tower. The name stark sounded familiar as well , but any time I tried to remember I'd get this bad migraine and had to stop. 

I started to walk by the tower every now and then. I did a lot of walking, I hoped that maybe I'd see something that would help me remember who I was. Of course I always kept in the shadows, I still felt the need to hide. Maybe it was from those hydra guys or maybe just a crazy ex, either way I didn't want to find out. 

This book was coming in handy so far. I haven't remembered much, but i get these crazy dreams. I could never remember them but i would always wake up drenched with sweat and my voice raspy from screaming. Yesterday in the front page of the newspaper it said happy birthday to captain America It showed a picture of him. I had a migraine for hours and my nose began to bleed.


	2. Welcome to Stark tower

Entry three  
August 12th 2014 

Since the incident with the newspaper I had been around stark tower a lot more.  
It was late and I was passing by the tower on my way back to where I was staying when i heard a blood curdling scream coming not far down the street,  
I started running. At first I didn't know if I was running away from it or towards it but I soon found myself in an ally next to a woman laying on the ground near the back of the dark ally. I had kneeled down next to her looking for wounds and only found one deep stab wound just below her rib cage. Her clothes were torn to shreds and so i quickly tore apart her shirt and tied it around the wound tightly.  
She was still awake but practically delirious. She was crying and going on about the fact that she was going to have to take another shower, unfazed by the wound or the possibility of dying. I gave her my sweater and told her I'd be back with help soon.  
I had ran out of the ally calling for help, but it was late and only a few cars sped down the street. I made a choice that in the end saved her life, I ran to the avengers.  
After minutes of banging on the doors a mans voice came out of seemingly nowhere.  
He had asked what I was doing and what the problem was and within a minute through the doors I saw stark and another man come running out. They had called 911 but I said she wouldn't make it. They followed me to the ally and helped keep her alive till the ambulance had taken her away. 

They asked me if I needed help too, I remember I had said " no, thank you though Howard I really appreciate it" he looked so hurt and confused but before anyone could say anything else I passed out. 

It wasn't till a few days later till I woke up. I remember thinking that the whole thing was a dream and that I was back home, till I started thinking about the man from last night. I had called him Howard, and as I had tried to think about why my nose started bleeding and my head was killing me, and before I could do anything else I had passed out again. 

 

Entry four 

(Your POV) 

You opened your eyes to the same room you were in earlier.  
You took a second before you began to sit up. After a few minutes of sitting in silence you got out of the bed and started to look around. The room seemed like a hospital but at the same time not, like a personal hospital room. Looking out of the windows you could see the city, you were in stark tower. 

You slowly made your way out of the room and out into the hall. Before you could move any further that man from the other night rushed over to you then guided you back to the bed. " my name is Bruce banner and your in stark tower. Do you remember what happened?" He spoke calmly you nodded " that's good. So what's your name?" He asked and you froze. "I-i can't remember" you said trying so hard to think. " ok that's alright, did you remember it last night before you fell?" You shook your head " I woke up in a old abandoned building in some machine a couple weeks ago. I-I dont remember anything before that" this made that man, Bruce nod silently  
" you called him Howard. Did you know a Howard?" You shook your head  
" He seemed so familiar and the name just kinda came to me. Like that other man captain America, he seems familiar too."  
After a while of Bruce questioning you he finally finished and then said he would bring some food for you. 

After a few days you were free to leave but mr.stark or as you now know him as tony stark had offered to let you stay in the tower. Of course you agreed, stark tower was better then the abandoned house you were staying in.  
He had introduced everyone as they came and went, so far you really liked Clint.  
You still had to meet Thor and captain America but the rest of the avengers you had now met and hopefully befriended. 

They say that captain America is coming back from his mission in the next couple days, although they keep calling him by his first name, Steve. Thinking about him gave you a headache so you tried not to think about him much, but thats kinda hard to do. Maybe he knew you? Maybe that's why your nose bleeds and your headaches get worse, but that would imply you also new Tony's father and he died years ago. 

That night you couldn't stop thinking about Steve. You ended up drinking with tony leaving almost to drunk to walk back to your room. You made it to the right hall way but ended up in Steves room one door down. I didn't really occur to you that none of the stuff was your so you carried on towards the bedroom. But out of the corner of your eye you spotted a small black and white picture in a frame on the wall.  
Nearing the photo you could see it was Steve and another man laughing with their arms around each other. You were looking at the other man, his short brown hair and his deep, beautiful blue eyes. Your head began to sting which soon became a jabbing pain and your vision getting more and more blurry, you doubled over letting out a loud shriek. But just before everything went black, your eyes caught a glimpse of red, white and blue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm bored so have another chapter. 
> 
> I hopefully fixed all the errors in chapter one but if I missed one feel free to let me know. Things start to pick up in the next chapter so stay with me here.


	3. The start of remembering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just giving up on a schedule and this will probably be complete and up by the end of next week, I just suck at being patient.
> 
> Same as always please leave me your thoughts and I hope you enjoy.

You could hear the sound of beeping and voices from not far off. You sighed before you even opened your eyes you knew where you were... again. 

Finally letting your eyes open slowly easing then into the light you saw tony and Bruce talking to a tall man with short blond hair. You couldn't see his face with his back turned but as the beeping of the heart rate monitor began to speed up they all turned their attention to you. Bruce was first to make his way in checking to make sure everything was alright before the other two entered. You could see now that the blond man was Steve Rogers. He came in the room standing next to tony near the end of your bed, he looked so sad.   
" hay kid. How you doing?" Tony said drawing your attention towards him " I'm fine I guess I just drank a little to much" you said letting your eyes wander back towards the blond. " not exactly. Cap here found you on the floor shaking with blood coming out of your nose. We checked you out and nothing seems wrong-"   
" do I know you?" You said cutting of tony while looking at Steve. He tensed slightly looking to the floor. "Yes" he replied flatly. Tony took the moment of silence to usher Bruce out leaving you with Steve alone. " who am I?" You said breaking the silence.   
" well what do you know?" He said moving to sit in the chair next to the bed. "nothing" I sighed. He rubbed his neck " your name is Valerie Bennett you were born June 30th 1918 You are 23 although I guess your actually 93 same as me. Your parents were Betty and Robert Bennett, you were an only child I don't really know what else to say" he finished. You had tears lining your sight but you refused to let them fall " who were you to me and how did we end up in 2014?" This made him laugh slightly " well you and I used to be best friends along with." He looked down wards " along with Bucky but you used to call him James. The three of us were practically family. after your parents died you moved in with me and James, and well... after a few years you and him got engaged." He paused " that's who was in the picture with you?" He nodded " yeah and for the whole time skip thing well long story short I became a super soldier and joined the army with james, we fought for a while but then he- he died. After that I fought on, crashed a plane in the arctic and got frozen for seventy years and survived because of the experiment and well when I woke up I was in 2012. They told me that you disappeared a year after I crashed and nobody ever saw you again."  
What felt like minutes went by before you could even speak let alone put together a sentence.   
But before either of you could say anything else tony came strolling in with a small box and then another on top of it. He placed them down in front of you smiling widely waiting for you to open them. You looked to Steve then down to the boxes opening them with unease.   
To your surprise you found a small sketch book and some professional pencils. You looked to tony confused " well kid Steve said you and him used to draw together and if you are as good as him then I thought maybe you should start back up" he said smiling, Steve now smiling himself as well.   
You nodded " thank you. But I don't understand I didn't do anything to deserve a gift tony"   
This made him laugh " look kid I just thought getting back into old habits will maybe help with getting your memory back. But if you don't want them then I'm sure Steve needs a new sketch pad" you shook your head while yawning " no, I love it. Thanks tony" she said lying back down. 

You jerked awake gasping for breath as you sat up. Your dream had made you cry yet you couldn't quite make out all the details. You remembered a man, screaming in pain. Screaming like I had never heard before. A cold shiver ran down your spine, the chair. You grabbed your sketch pad and began drawing furiously as if your life depended one it, and it's possible that someone else's life just might.   
It was still dark out side leaving the only light you had to be the dim side lamp Steve always left on when you went to sleep in your own room. It made the drawing harder to do but something told you, you didn't have time to get up to turn on a light. After almost four hours of sketching you had finally began to get tired. You fought hard to stay awake but dosed off with your pencil and book still in your arms. 

Just like earlier you woke up with the same images in your head and tears streaming down your face. This time instead of the face and screaming, you mind focused one the chair. Starting all over again you flipped to a new page and began. When you had finished the sun was just starting to come up and you could here the tower come to life as people began to come and work through out the day. You looked to both drawing trying to bring back more but as you flip back and forth your mind filled with those same screams from your dream. So loud, so gut wrenching, you curled up as small as you could on the bed and began to cry. 

That's how Steve found you not much later. He didn't expect you to be awake after his run but he always checked to make sure.   
He quickly ran over to you asking if you were ok and you nodded " just a bad dream" you told him and he nodded but in his eye you could tell he wanted to press you more about it. " tony said you are being let out later today. You nodded looking past him to where you had hid the pad under the mattress. 

He was right not much later you were allowed to leave your hospital room in trade for your own.   
You knew you should tell Steve and tony about the drawings but something in the back of your mind screamed no. 

 

February 2015

It had only been a couple days since the avengers had taken down ultron.   
You hadn't been in the fights but you became good friends with Wanda after her brother died. She had talked about maybe restoring your memory but you had put it off until you really needed it. You had spent a lot of time with Clint training so you could protect your self and maybe join in with the team, if of course Steve would allow it. 

A few days before Thor left back for asgard you had seen his hammer on the dinning room table and since it was in the way you easily picked it up at moved it to the coffee table. " i knew you'd be able to lift it" you yelped turning to Clint who had been leaning against the door. " well its not that heavy so yeah id assume everyone can lift it" you continued setting plates down as he moved closer. " nope its just you Thor and vision. Nobody else is worthy" you looked at him strangely waiting for an explanation but Thor came in looking to loot the fridge before dinner. He looked back and forth from the coffee table to the dinning table his brows knit together in confusion. " neither of you moved it" he said, more as an answer then a question. He took a second to look at it before he left once again. " if i were you id hold that to your self till the right time. Clint finished leaving you alone.

After everything calmed down you could tell something was still bothering Steve. He would leave with Sam for a while then return only to distance himself for a while.  
You knew he was keeping something from you, but you wouldn't push. because in the end you were hiding things from him too. 

You were still having strange dreams, but part of you began to think that maybe just maybe, these weren't just dreams.


	4. " you want to tell him there sweetheart or should I"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the bold text is mean to be Val's dreams just so you know.  
> ( trigger warning for rape and torture)  
> Iv put in warning so you can skip if you want 
> 
> I'm leaving this cliff hanger for a couple days so enjoy!
> 
> Don't forget to kudos and leave a comment about what you thought.

(Your POV)

 **Two men were dragging you down a hall Your feet dragging across the floor as they finally turned into a large room filled with people. Some wearing white coats and others armed with guns. The guards holding you stopped hauling you to your feet at the end of the balcony that over looked the rest of the room with that chair in the middle.**  
**Doctors scrambling away from a man who was yelling and attacking who ever he got his hands on. His left arm metal snapping people's necks with ease as he rampaged. The sound of the door made everyone quiet down even the man who was killing everyone. A man with a suit stepped up beside you waving away the guards who stood next to you. " you've made a big mess here soldier. You are to obey all orders directed toward you." The soldier growled " my name is Bucky."**  
**This made the man laugh grabbing you by the hair and practically throwing you against the railing " well you've been remembering for a while then have you? Well then you remember your sweet little fiancé here then don't you"**  
**The soldier stiffened moving his hands to his head " v-Valerie?" He choked out dropping to his knees " no she can't be here. He, He would have saved her" he yelled out the last bit. The man in the suit pulled your hair harder, causing the tears that were building up to fall. " you want to tell him there sweetheart or should I"**  
**You choked back your sobbing " Steve died James. He died in a plane crash saving New York" you cried harder watching Bucky fall to the ground completely as he cried. " now I suggest you comply with your orders soldier or the next time this happens I'll shoot her point blank in front of you. Got it?"**  
**Guards came out grabbing Bucky and dragging him into the chair strapping him down as he cried mumbling about his compliance over your freedom.**  
**The two guards from earlier moved to grab you again but the man stopped them " let her watch, I want to see how far we can break her."**  
**As they finished strapping him in to the chair he slowly looked up to you " I love you so much I-" was all he managed to say before the man in the suit ordered the full wipe and the machine hummed to life. Pieces moved, towards his face and pressing against him hiding most of his face. His screams made your vision blurry and your legs give out.**

  
You woke up screaming, gasping for air and unable to move. You were being restrained by someone but through the dark you couldnt see who. " Valerie stop, its me Steve stop your ok" they said but you began to fight harder " please let him go please take me please I'll do what ever you want just let him go" you screamed tears wetting your face and pillows as you tried to get away from your attacker. Before you could beg any more the lights turned on are you could see Steve straddling you while keeping your hands above your head. It took a second for you to take in what had happened before he let your hands go. You shoot up hugging Steve as he still sat on your legs. " oh god Steve your alive they said you died" you sobbed into his neck.  
After a moment Steve moved off you, lifting you into his lap cradling you in his hold.  
You hadn't realized the figure standing in the door way till Steve waved them off, Noticing the small glimpse of red hair that caught your eye  
" it's ok. Your fine. Now who was he? Who were you trying to protect?" He asked calmly as he stroked your hair down. Taking a deep breath you started to explain,  
" my dreams aren't just dreams. Their my memories" you took a second " Steve. It's James. he's still alive, it was hydra they took him. Made him forget. Made him kill people" Steve sighed hugging you tighter but you pushed away looking him in the eye " Steve he fought so hard. He always kept remembering and they would bring me out to keep him in control. To keep him from getting away" you said looking down as Steve sighed again " I know. Iv seen him" he took a second before continuing " he got away from hydra. He's remembering. He just doesn't want to be found. That's why I leave with Sam on missions, we've been trying to find him."  
" but then why did you tell me he died. Why didn't you say he was alive?" You were confused " I didn't tell you because I don't want to overwhelm you. I was going to tell you once you started to remember."  
You nodded " how can our lives be this complicated" you said lying back on the bed.  
Steve shook his head " I don't know Val. I don't know" he finished joining you.

After breakfast and a lot of teasing from tony because of Steve falling asleep in your bed, You had shown him all the drawings You had made over time. James, the chair, the man in the suit, your engagement ring and a few pages of the apartment the three of you had once shared. That being most of what you had remembered so far, He smiled going through the last few telling you story's like how you used to go down to the dinner twice a week so the dishes were always equally divided or how the you and Steve would play chess while Bucky made dinner or vice versa. You couldn't remember everything but from what you knew and what he said you could tell you had been truly happy, till your boys had been shipped off to war.

  
They had been planning a mission to stop a group of hydra agents led by Brock Rumlow. And the news had been loving them ever since.  
Not only had their been a few casualties but Rumlow had said something to Steve that had startled him greatly.  
He had been acting weird all day and it had only been getting worse. Any time you had even tried to get near him, he'd push you farther then before.

Steve had been zoned out in the lounge for almost an hour, just looking out the window. You sat watching him for a while before you finally decided to go confront him.

"Steve?" You said shifting into his line of sight. you repeated his name louder then before causing him to jump slightly "what?" He snapped shifting his head to look at you. " I'm sorry I shouldn't have bothered you" you stuttered quickly getting up and moving towards the door. " I'm sorry" he said stopping you from leaving, " I'm just so mad. Buckys out there alone and he won't let me help him" he looked towards the floor as you moved to sit next to him. " I still don't remember everything but do you think that maybe he's changed? After what they made him do, he's afraid of hurting others. He's afraid of himself" you said sadly as Steve leaned his head to your shoulder. " I just want to help him" he whispered.  
" I still don't remember being taken or what happened after that really but I remember before the war" you wrapped your arms around him " I remember you, I remember him and I remember how much I loved you both" you kissed his cheek lightly " we will find him Steve I promise, just give it time." You both sat there for what seemed like hours, and possibly could have been before tony barged in ranting about something you couldn't understand. You and Steve quickly separated before tony saw you but failed. "And what is this?" His mood instantly picking up " cap with a married woman? Tisk tisk. How is your buddy going to feel?" He playfully wagged a finger towards you both. " I'm not married yet and I'm comforting him. I'll let you have bragging rights when you either A stop sleeping around or B actually catch me in the act" you snapped back at him, leaving both the boys with their mouths open in shock.  
" well... aren't you just a ray of sunshine" tony said moving towards the bar to get a drink before heading back out towards his lab.  
You leaned your head against his shoulder taking a deep breath sighing while he rested his head over yours. Slowly you dozed off letting your dreams take over.

( smut/rape) **You opened your eyes looking back at another's eyes, above you. you screamed pulling yourself away from them falling off the bed, dragging yourself across the floor till your back hit the wall. The figure you could now see was a man with shoulder length brown hair that blocked his face, Slowly he turned his head towards you. You gasped as you looked into his eyes quickly leaping towards him wrapping your arms around his neck as sobbing. " James oh god James your ok Steve said you died everyone thinks your dead" he slowly moved his left hand up towards your head grabbing a hand full of your hair and ripping you away from him and throwing you back on the bed. You looked up at him, his face full of confusion and disgust. " James don't you know me? It's me Valerie. Your fiancé" he grunted grabbing your ankle and pulling you towards him he leaned down smelling your hair before he grabbed your shirt ripping it open. " James stop. What are you doing? Let me go!" You tried to push against him but he pinned you down as he continued to strip you. " what's wrong with you!" You gasped letting the tears you were holding in finally fall. he left you in your underwear while he began to undue his pants. He grunted continuing with his pants finally releasing himself from his pants. " James please, we wanted to wait till our wedding" you continued to sob. With one hand he kept your hands pinned above your head while using the other to line himself up with your entrance before he plunged himself in. You screamed arching your back, as he started to thrust into you. You closed your eyes waiting till it was over, but as it went on you couldn't pull your mind away from the assault.  
Just as you felt him release within you felt a searing pain within you, something wasn't right. He had walked away leaving you to pull yourself back together and put on what was left of your torn clothes. You were stopped from doing up what buttons you could on your shirt as he returned walking towards you readying himself for round two.**

( end of trigger warning)

You jolted awake panting hard as tears painted your cheeks. Steve had fallen asleep next to you, his arms wrapped around you but was woken by your movements.  
He let you cry into his shoulder as he shushed you asking what you dreamt about but you refused to tell him. You couldn't bear to watch him recoil in horror as you expected he would. You shook your head letting out a shuttered breath as you had  
Started to calm down.

(Steve's POV)

You hadn't been sleeping since you both had fallen asleep on the couch in the lounge last month, he could see it in your face. Most dreams you would tell Steve about even some of them to others but you hadn't shared since that day and that's what had Steve worried so much.

  
" she barely sleeps anymore. I'm afraid that remembering everything that happened while she was with hydra is going to kill her" Steve said worriedly. But before anymore elaboration could happen she burst through the doors collapsing just as she had gotten through the doors. Steve had run over to her picking her up moving her to the table Bruce had cleared off. " what's going on Jarvis?" Tony said panicked as Bruce began to check her heart and lungs. " well it appears that miss. Bennett had a severe panic attack after passing out in her room over half an hour ago" Jarvis said projecting a video of her passing out then flailing and screaming several minutes later for almost twenty minutes. " play the audio there J it looks like she's talking in her sleep." The video reset it self and started from the top, " no.." she flailed " please I didn't say anything to him. Please" she stopped for several seconds before she screamed and flailed once again. She woke up screaming no before she lost control of her breathing and dashed out of the room.  
The screen disappeared leaving the three in silence looking over you.

  
( your POV)

You watched Steve pacing in the small space of the jet nervous yourself as for what was about to happen. You had waited three long months since your incident in the lab before Sam had called Steve telling him he found Bucky. He packed up and told you to stay behind but you fought with him till he caved. You as well as Steve, Natasha and Sam were headed to Germany since he was spotted early yesterday morning and hopefully he'd still be there. The flight was silent but as you switched to a large rented van Steve began to tell us the plan.

Of course when you had finally got their Steve forced you to stay in the car and wait till they had gotten back. But after almost twenty minutes of radio silence you could see a man jumping off the roof and over to the next building. You watched but nobody had followed him so you quickly got out of the car and began running into the next building. You ran up the first set of stairs you saw only to be attacked as you reached the forth floor. " shit James" you gasped as you saw the his face. He moved to attack again but you flinched away " please you have to remember" you said quickly awaiting for him to do something but as you opened your eyes you could see he wasn't going to hurt you. " do you remember me James?" You said softly watching his face contort into confusion as he thought. " leave me alone, your dead" he said as he started moving downwards, ignoring you as if you were a ghost. " Bucky please I'm not dead, I'm here" you rushed after him grabbing his arm. He thrashed his arm away moving to grab your throats with his left hand squeezing slightly "who are you, why are you following me" he squeezed harder, just enough to scar you. " it's me Valerie. I'm not dead, Steve found me. He kept me safe and he can keep you safe too" you said as you gripped his arm tightly. He let his arm drop to you shoulder making sure you could stand before letting go completely " but who's going to protect you all from me" he almost whispered. " we can help you keep control. Please I've missed you" you said moving your arms out to touch him causing him to wince " no."  
" then let me come with you. I'll help you remember and when your ready we can go back to Steve" he shook his head but you moved your hands to his face " if you really didn't care you would have tried to leave. So it's settled, I'm coming with you" you took out your phone and began typing furiously before setting the phone down for everyone to find. " there now lets go" you said following him as he started running off again.

This would be fun...


	5. "Did I ever hurt you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: smut.
> 
> Ok so up to chapter 5 yay!  
> There's only a couple more chapters to go and it only gets more interesting from here.
> 
> Thank you for reading so far and I'd love to hear your thoughts.

You and Bucky had hidden in a cargo ship and found your way to England.  
You had found a small abandoned house in the more rough area of London. You had talked him into letting you get a job and slowly you gained enough to rent a small apartment near the outskirts of the city. He spent most of his time in the apartment since his arm would give you both away.

Today after work you had walked home but had forgotten that when opening the door you were supposed to knock first. You unlocked the door opening it and closing it before you were grabbed and thrown against the wall causing you to gasp dropping the grocery bags you had been holding "it's me. It's me" you said tapping his arm till he let you down. " you didn't knock" he said walking towards the kitchen leaving you in the hall. " sorry I had a bad day at work and I forgot"  
He returned with an ice pack handing it to you as he took your bags that you had dropped. " thanks" you held it to your throat following him to the kitchen.  
As he unpacked the bags you sat watching him " another few weeks then we can leave London and find another place to rent since we've been here a while"  
He nodded " we'll go from here to France for a couple day then skip from there"  
You coughed getting up to grab a glass of water, but he moved to sit you back down grabbing the glass for you. " I'm sorry" he said placing the glass down. You waved him off as you downed the glass, setting the now empty glass back down. " did you remember much last night? You were still asleep when I left and you kept mumbling about a mission" he shook his head " I'm fine" he brushed it off moving from the kitchen into the bathroom " I'm taking a shower" he stated quickly before closing the door. " I'll start making dinner" you said loudly, sighing as you stood getting out what you would need to made the meal. You had taken out everything you needed to made spaghetti when you heard a loud crashing sound that came from the bathroom.  
Practically dropping the pasta you ran towards the bathroom knocking furiously,  
"Bucky what happened? Are you ok?" You pressed your ear up to the door waiting for an answer through the sound of the shower running but all you could hear was the quiet, muffled sound of crying. You panicked " can you unlock the door?" Not receiving an answer you moved back from the door " stay back I'm going to break the door down."  
Taking a deep breath you kicked the door as hard as you could but it didn't budge.  
You took another deep breath quickly lunging your body at the door, cursing as it to give at under the pressure and break off the hinges.  
Moving the door to the side you could see Bucky still in the shower curled up in a ball rocking back and forth crying.  
You moved towards him reaching your hand out to touch his shoulder causing him to jump slightly moving as he looked at you, his eyes red and his face puffy. " oh James"  
You didn't even care if the water was still on you moved sitting next to him rubbing his back as your clothes became soaked.  
After almost an hour of you both sitting in the shower in silence he spoke up.  
" we leave tonight" he stood, stepping out of the shower and wrapping himself in a towel before he walked out of the bathroom only to return moments later leaving you a towel. 

You both had packed what little you had and left the apartment in the dead of night.  
Before you had started your journey to France, he had said he needed to make a stop. Little did you know that stop would be robbing a money loan place.  
After your robbery adventures you both found your way to France.  
Bucky had found a small abandoned shop that would suffice for shelter for the couple days you would be here before you left for another country.

 

Steves POV

You had been gone for almost two months and Steve was taking it the worst. Him, Sam and now the rest of the team had been searching but just as before, Bucky was always one step ahead leaving them in the dust. 

As soon as they had gotten the call about England they flew there as fast as they could and when they did make it to the apartment they found nothing but a wet bathtub and a pot of water still warm on the the stove. The worst part about the whole thing was that they weren't even sure if Valerie had wanted to go or if he had just taken her.

He really hoped that he could get her back because part of him had started to love her.

 

Your POV

After leaving France you both had slowly made your way to Volgograd Russia.  
It was a beautiful place and had so many places to hid. 

You couldn't leave your hotel let alone get a job without Bucky since you couldn't speak Russian. You would both have to pack up and leave for somewhere new before your money ran out, and that small pile of cash was quickly dissipating.  
He had brought you to a small cabin in the woods distanced from the city. From the outside you would see an abandoned cabin ugly and forgotten, on the inside it was dusty and bare. The first floor was an ancient kitchen an a small cot but under that raggedy cot was a large basement with a bedroom an office a nice bathroom and a functional kitchen with a small couch and table across from it. not to mention actual power and and heating. You stayed downstairs to keep up the appearance that the house was empty. Bucky had been trying to teach you Russian so that if you had needed to go out by yourself you could. but would end up getting frustrated and give up, going on about how he learned though his time with hydra.  
He hadn't remembered everything but you could see little bits and pieces of the old Bucky every now and then before he would shut you out and become the soldier.  
One minute he was his old flirtatious self then in another he was silent and even his slightest movements were calculated.

He said he had remembered some of his missions but little of before the war.  
You knew it would take time for him to remember, if he ever remembered at all.  
It would take time and your James or not you would give your life to the man standing in front of you. 

You woke up to someone shaking you slightly opening your eyes to see someone sitting over you. You jumped but they turned on the light. Realizing who it was you sighed sitting up in the bed. " you scared me. What do you need is something wrong?" You said still groggy. " when I was with hydra. Did I ever hurt you?" He said moving away towards the edge of the bed. You shook your head slightly " they never really woke me up unless you started to remember and they couldn't control you and even then they wouldn't let you near me."  
" no. Did I ever..." he took a deep breath before continuing " did i ever rape you"  
You sat with your mouth agape " James. It wasn't you" he stood moving away from the bed pacing the perimeter of the room, keeping away from the bed. " why. Why would you let me near you. Why would you stay with me. How can you still care?  
I'm a monster!" He threw his fist through the closest wall " I stayed because while it was happening you cried. The whole time you cried". You said getting out of the bed moving towards him. " the next time they brought me from cryo you had killed twelve guards and six doctors. They brought me to you with a gun to my head and told you to stand down. You took down the guards down and locked us both in a room. You cried into my arms for an hour before they broke the door down and when they dragged you away you screamed I'm sorry and said that you didn't deserve to be saved from hydra"  
You turned his face towards you " i forgave you and the only thing left is for you to forgive yourself" he shook his head. " i can never forgive myself" he said blinking away the stray tears " this is the man i fell in love with" you kissed his cheek " and ill wait till you decide if you still love me. You moved his fist from the wall dragging him to the bed, moving to turn off the light then getting into the bed yourself. 

You were startled awake by the sounds of yelling. James was having another nightmare as he thrashed around. " no. No. no. No. please no i couldn't stop" he screamed sitting up finally waking himself. He looked over to you breathing heavy, sweat beading down his face. You opened your mouth to say something but he was up and in the bathroom before you could even get a sound out. 

 

You had been in Russia for a little over six months now.  
You both had gotten closer as both of your memories had been coming back. 

You had insisted that he slept in the bed with you since he would hurt himself waking up on the floor, or hurt the floor from his metal fists in the process.  
He was talking more and occasionally you both could talk about the things you remembered, of course his story's were more during hydras time but you knew that he was remembering, you knew he was putting the pieces back together and you could only watch in awe.

His returning memories had been slow the past week but you knew that they hadn't stopped. You were both in bed his back towards you as you watched his chest rise and fall. After awhile you felt yourself drift off but were soon brought back from the sounds of whimpering and moaning. You sat up turning on the dim side lamp seeing him splayed out on the bed with what could only be an erection. You looked at the bulge through the blanket eyes wide in shock, should you wake him up? You thought watching him turn on his side towards you. You left the light turning away from him lying back down gazing at the wall figuring out what to do.  
He made a loud grunt but before you could turn to look at him you felt his arm snake around your waist and pull you close to him. It wouldn't have been that bad beside the fact that his arousal was poking in between your legs rubbing your entrance slightly. You moaned as his hips jerked a tiny bit, biting your lip you tried to move but his grip tightened. You stayed giving up your attempts to escape, covering your eyes from the light so you could sleep. Moments went by in silence before his grip tightened and he gasped lightly. He sat up pushing you away as he sat on the edge of the bed his fists gripping the sheets tightly.  
You yawned sitting up slowly seeming to just wake up. " what time is it?" You asked looking for a response but got nothing. You stood moving to crouch down in front of him, looking into his eyes. His pupils were blown wide and he had a look that could only be described as a lost puppy. You asked him what was wrong watching his eyes drift downwards, following his you looked to his member still pushing against his boxers. You both looked at each other before you threw all caution to the wind and kissed him. It quickly escalated as you moved to sit on his lap letting him lay down with your mouths still connected.  
You broke apart breathing heavy as he looked at you ready to rip off your clothes " are you ok?" He panted. You nodded " I need you James" and with that you crashed your lips together once again as you pulled away only to take off your shirt leaving your self in only your underwear. He flipped you over so he was above you while he teased your nipples with his tongue. You ran your hands through his hair as he moved down to the edge of your panties before looking up at you silently asking for consent.  
You nodded giving it to him pushing your hips up so he could slid them off with ease.  
He hovered above your dripping wet folds his breath rolling over your body for a moment before he licked the length of your opening.  
You moaned loudly his arms moving to hold down your jerking hips.  
Finding your clit he sucked on it moving to play with that more as one of his metal fingers pressed into you. The coldness within you made you shudder wanting more,  
And without a word he added a second curling them both within you  
You came practically screaming his name. He moved to kiss you again before he took off his boxers and lining himself up. He looked to you waiting for your nod, and when you did his tip slowly sunk into you. He paused letting you stretch before he added the rest of his length. You could see he was holding back from just losing himself within you but you thoughts were cut off when he started to move. He started slow, picking up speed gradually. He pounded into you moving to give some attention to your nipples, his tongue swirling around it before he nipped lightly. You could feel your body building back up to your release, and you could see that he wouldn't last much longer either. His breath turned ragged as he groaned deeply releasing himself within you.  
You felt his seed within you and you knew the risk of pregnancy but you didn't care.  
He laid next to you calming his breathing while apologizing but you sat up looking him in the eye. " you may not remember it but were practically married. Don't apologize for sex."  
He didn't speak for the rest of the night although you fell asleep not long after his apology. 

The next morning you found yourself stretched out across the bed leaving no room for another. There was a loud clattering sound making you sit up swiftly moving to the knife kept under the pillows. Wrapping the blanket around yourself you moved to the door knife in hand, ready to strike. Silently you slipped through the door only to see Bucky in the kitchen trying to make what looked like pancakes. You let out a sigh dropping the knife down on the counter and moved to make coffee watching his eyes go from you to the knife with raised eyebrows. " I guess I should start training you now since we're safe here for a while" you hummed sipping your coffee while moving back to the bedroom " I'll be back in a second to help with breakfast."  
You had closed the door dropping the blanket on the bed moving to gather all of your clothes before putting them on and heading back out to him. " how about later before lunch" you said moving to take over the pan as he burned the batter. He nodded stepping back to watch you cook, " look. About last night-"  
" James if you apologize one more time I swear to god" you huffed making him smile.  
" no I was going to say thank you. I know it's been hard for you with all that's been happening and I know I've changed but I hope even at the end of all this if we can't still be together then I still want to be friends." You turned the stove off dishing out plates before moving to the small table that sat next to the counter. " as much as I'd like to say I hope it all goes back to normal I think we can both agree that nither of us are never going to be completely the same. So all I can really hope for is that we can love who we've become... now enough deep conversation, I haven't had enough coffee for this yet." He laughed sitting across from you starting on his large stack of pancakes.

Finally finishing you both washed the dishes before he told you to change into workout clothes. Of course not having any you settled on just a pair of loose sweatpants and a tank top. 

He said it would be easy to start with basic defensive training and so far it wasn't that hard. He showed you the basic blocking techniques before he started to throwing punches in slow motion, slowly building up speed so you could quickly get the hang of blocking. Occasionally throwing in new moves getting you to start thinking on the spot about what to do. After almost three hours you had given up to tired to continue, looking at him you could see he was just getting started. He walked to the kitchen to grab a glass of water for you completely unfazed by the hours of work you had been doing. " before you get in the shower will you just lay on my back while I do push ups?" He passed you the glass watching you down it. You put the now empty glass down cocking a brow at him " sure" you replied shortly watching him get into position on the floor you moved towards him " should I lay on my side or?" He turned to look at you " do whatever" he shrugged. You laughed nervously before laying on your side. He started not even fazed by your weight laying on him. After losing count around fifty he swiftly moved to wrap his metal arm around you waist still going with his one hand. " holy shit" you said under your breath watching him do one handed pushups even with you still laying along his back. He did twenty before he stopped waiting for you to get off before standing himself. " you up for more?" He asked smiling slightly wiping away the sweat beading down his face. " now your just showing off" you smiled moving back towards him. He laid down on his back moving his arms up " I'm going to use you as a weight. Are you ok with that?" He asked, smiling as you nodded moving towards him. " ok lean back so one of my hands on on your back and then the other will be on the back of your leg. Your going to need to put on leg over the other and stay straight like a plank" you nodded moving to do what he said. After he was holding you for a second he started moving, his arms hauling you up and down rather quickly. " just tell me if you need to stop and I'll put you down" he said the sound of his voice straining slightly as he lifted you. He only did thirty before you tapped out your core muscles screaming from holding your self straight for so long. Putting you down lightly you both laid on the floor breathing in the silence. He let you have the first shower as you assumed he probably wanted to finish off his workout, and you were right because after you had gotten out of the shower he was still doing sit ups. 

 

After another few months quickly passed you could say everything was going great. You both spent each day training, sometimes even twice a day for three to four hours. You had gotten really good although you still weren't even close to his level. You had taken him down once earlier this week playing dirty but he assured you it wouldn't happen again. He had also started you with weapons training taking turns doing hand to knife combat, along with guns and other weapons. You could honestly say that as a girl from the 40s, this was the most fun you've had in ages. even if training with the winter soldier was a pain, you could at least say you were being trained by the best of the best. You remember him saying that he used to train a girl he fought that was with Steve back on the bridge, which could only mean Natasha. That was a shock, but you could see why she was so good, maybe just maybe one day you could be as good a her. Maybe then Steve would stop worrying over you so much, that is if you ever saw Steve again.


	6. Naked and afraid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a rewritten version of the original entry 8  
> It has no effect of how the story ends and does not need to be read to make sense to the rest of the story story. 
> 
> This chapter is rated T while the first is M.  
> Personally I like this one better but you can decide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to get your hopes up if you thought this was a new chapter.  
> This is just the original version of entry 8 ( kinda like bonus material)
> 
> This is a rewritten version of the original entry 8  
> It has no effect of how the story ends and does not need to be read to make sense to the story. 
> 
> This chapter is rated T while the first is M.  
> Personally I like this one better but you can decide.

Your POV 

 

After hours of strained training and sparing with Bucky, you and him both ended up moving to the bedroom. Another two hours passed before you and Bucky both ended up passed out not even left with the energy to pull a sheet over your naked forms.

Steve's POV  
( four hours later)

" look at this place Steve there not here" Sam said moving around the room.  
Steve shook his head " they have to be here the old woman said she saw a woman that matched Val's description not even a week a-"  
" come look at this Steve" Sam said beckoning him to the other end of the small room. He moved toward sam, his eyes catching the thin break in the floor under the bed that sam had pointed out. " call tony down here, i want him to scan this place, and tell him to bring nat. If their here we'll need to have numbers... who knows what state of mind he's in." Sam nodded walking out to the front of the house to make the call. 

After hours of waiting Tony and Nat had joined sam and him in the small cabin looking for what ever could be under the small cabin.

Tony being well, Tony gloated about himself while he worked taking no more than a good minute to find the lock for the hidden door and another five to get it open.  
All suited up they silently followed the stairs down to the small living room. Careful to stay quiet. Looking around they stand in a dark living area adjoining a kitchen, their only light being the dim light above the stove.  
" someone's been living here. Look at all the furniture that's been pushed to the sides" sam whispered as they stood unsure of their next move. " we got two people in the other room" stark pointed towards the door that wasn't fully closed.  
Steve raised his shield up slowly pushing through the door, the others waiting for a signal. The room was silent for a minute before a loud yelp sounded out followed by a crash and a scream. The others piled through the door ready to attack before a lamp off to the side flickered on and they stood stunned at what they were looking at. 

(Your POV)

You were startled awake by a loud yelp followed by a crash, causing you to scream while siting up swiftly and turning on the nightstand lamp, knife in one hand and the thin sheet covering your naked form in the other. It took you a second to fully understand what was happening before the the door was blocked off by Tony, Sam and Natasha all ready to strike down any threat.  
On the floor just at the end of the bed laid Steve in full uniform on the floor with Bucky straddling his hips to keep him down while he pointed a gun to his head... while completely naked. 

There was a full minute where nobody moved, stunned by the two super soldiers on the floor. Tony being the first to crack burst out laughing to the point where he had to take a knee, while in the suit. Sam soon followed, while Natasha had a full blown grin as she stood taking pictures of them both. 

After a few minutes of everyone's laughter ( Bucky and Steve didn't think it was funny) Bucky got off Steve and picked up his shorts from the floor before passing you your clothes and shooing the avengers to the living room. 

" well that was horrifying" you giggled anxiously, untangling yourself from the sheets to get dressed. Bucky glared at you " its not funny." You took a second to straighten your smile before you spoke. " at least there wasn't a fight. You knew they'd find us eventually." He sighed sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting for you to finished getting dressed. " I thought we had more time. I'm not ready for Steve to be in my life right now." You sighed moving towards him, taking his face in your hands.  
" he knows your not the same person and he's not expecting you to be perfectly fine buck. He isn't the same either." He dropped his head down, looking at his lap.  
" what about stark, they'll take me away from you. Or what about his p-" you put your finger over his mouth. " no. Don't even. Your not responsible for what the soldier did. You know that" he nodded weakly. " we going with them?" You ran your hands through his hair as he pulled you into his lap. " I don't think we have a choice"  
" well we could always hid in the panic room till they leave." He looked at you for a moment before shaking his head " no. I'm in control and Steve will hate me if I take you away from him any longer." You let out a snort " Im engaged to you not him buck he misses you just as much as he misses me." He nodded standing, pulling you in for a kiss " I don't know where I'd be without you doll." 

You both went into the living room seeing all eyes on you as the four avengers stood awkwardly in the middle of the room. you saw everyone's eyes look up behind you. " buck" Steve nodded, but he didn't reply. " he's shy" you laughed earning a light nudge from him behind you. " well I guess the tin man finally got a heart" tony laughed as you glared at him.  
" well then let's get you packed up and into the jet." Sam said walking up the stairs to the jet. James brushed his hand against your back before going into the bathroom to get the bags he had packed quickly. You stood in silence with Steve and tony waiting till James returned before heading up to the jet.  
You all walked up to the jet tony in front of you and James while Steve walked behind.  
Going into the jet James dropped the bags down sitting tensely watching everybody's movements. 

It was going to be a long couple of days. 

 

Chapter nine 

After leaving the jet tony took James to his lab placing a small tracker in his arm and then showing him to his room next to Steve's and across from yours. You sat on his bed as he looked around the room for cameras and audio recorders, finding none. Of course you didn't even try to explain to him how Jarvis works.  
He wouldn't leave his room except for when you lead him to get dinner, watching him scurry back to his room. 

The next day you were able to sneak away long enough to head to the gym. You started of with the punching bag warming your self up, till you saw Natasha walk in.  
" wanna spar?" She raised a brow smiling slightly as she moved towards the mats.  
She started, throwing a right hook that you easily dodged ducking down swiping your leg to trip her. She flipped back kicking out to hit me but missed as you pushed yourself back on all fours for a moment before flipping back up.  
She smirked running at you jumping to wrap her legs around your neck as she used her hands to simulate a knife. Before she could lay a hit you dropped down throwing her to the ground as you rolled kicking her hand away and restraining her hands quickly doing the same to her legs. She laughed as you used your free hand to pretend to slit her throat. " your good" you got off her moving to grab your water bottle. " you were holding back" you said in between breaths. " well iv had my whole life you've had months" she shrugged " but you could probably beat Sam or Steve if he didn't have his shield" you sighed " lets go again. This time no holding back"  
" alright but if your still up after I'm bringing in Sam. I wanna see how you fight from the sidelines."  
You started this time moving fast towards her " so I heard you were picked to be trained by the winter soldier himself" you said watching her let herguard down quickly before she said anything you tripped her leg and spun around to kick her in the head but she dodged tapping out, " I'm going to get sam" she said walking out.

Of course Sam being Sam went down after two minutes claiming he was going easy on you but you and Natasha both knew he was lying. 

 

That night had been hard. After finishing up at the gym with Natasha you had taken a shower and went to bed not hungry for dinner. The dreams hadn't been pleasant. 

You opened your eyes practically jerking awake to the sound of a car horn. You got out of your bed walking down the hall to the bathroom before moving to the kitchen to make coffee. You poured out three cups placing them on the table before sipping one. After you finished your cup you picked up the cups easily dumping the untouched cups down the drain before putting them to the side to be washed later, moving back to your room you got ready for work. Just before you closed the door you moved to the sketch book on the table in the living room, taking a moment to look at the unfinished drawing that laid out. You left for work early so you could get the pay for your double shifts only to return hours later, tired and dirty. You made Steve's favourite laying out the three plates to eat.  
Just as you stood to clean the dishes there was a knock on the door. Moving swiftly you opened it only to see an older man in a military uniform. " I'm here to ask that you come confirm the identity of a body suspected to be James Barnes."  
You gasped running to grab your coat, not caring that you were still wearing your waitressing dress. You followed the man down to the car getting in the back beside him as the man in front drove off. before you even left the street you felt a prick in the back of your neck and everything went dark.

You woke up in your bed with someone spooning you from behind. You stayed still panicking, unsure what to do. " go back to sleep doll it's just me" you relaxed knowing that voice belonged to James. Feeling the warmth from his body, letting it soothe you back to sleep.

The morning came fast as you woke to the sound of a distant knocking. Sitting up you heard the shower running and could see the steam rolling out through the open door. You got out of bed moving to open the front door only to be met with Steve standing at Buckys door. He turned to look at you slightly surprised he looked past you into your room as he heard the shower running. His eyebrows raised as he looked back to you, his cheeks reddening. " I- sorry to disturb you could you just tell Bucky that I need to talk to him" he said quickly leaving. You closed the door laughing slightly thinking back to Steve before the serum, but you were quickly taken out of your thoughts as the shower stopped. You turned to the door watching as Bucky came out still naked using a towel to dry his hair. " you know" you walked over to him grabbing the towel from his hands " if you don't dry this thing it's going to get rusty" you began slowly wiping down his metal arm. " who was at the door?" He said breaking your little moment, " oh yeah, it was Steve he said he needed to talk to you." He hummed grabbing the towel back from you and throwing to the floor before he grabbed your ass and lifted you up.  
You laughed wrapping your legs around his waist, while wrapping your arms around his neck. You kissed him as he moved, practically dropping you on the bed before he crawled over you taking your lips in his. You pushed him away " as much as I'd love to I have to be in the gym in five to train with nat and you mister have a serious conversation to have with Steve." he sighed " I told you coming here wasn't going to be fun" he stood moving to the dresser to put on clean clothes throwing your work out clothes at you as he rummaged around for his clothes. " I suppose you should keep more of your stuff in here" he nodded holding out the sweat pants and tee shirt you stole from him. You hummed watching him put on his pants " howling commando gone commando?" He sent you a playful glare as you laughed. " well I'd rather that then running across the hall naked" you laughed agreeing that tony would use that as blackmail one day. After you both finished dressing you kissed his cheek following him to the door. "Ill see you in a bit?" You asked as he opened the door for you. "Yeah ill probably come down to the gym after I go talk to steve. But if not then ill see your at dinner" you hummed " i hear tonys actually going to use his chef instead of take out tonight." He huffed " sounds hard to believe" you hummed in agreement as you both turned your separate ways at the end of the hall. Entering the elevator you went down to the training rooms upon entering you were surprised to see Thor who apparently came to check on things for a few days. You had done a couple stretches getting ready for your face off with sam but he still hadn't shown up. You looked up through the glass of the viewing area seeing him, along with practically the rest of the team ready to watch the fight. You moved towards Natasha not even needing to ask the obvious question about what was happening. " your going to fight Thor and i made an agreement with Steve that if you can beat Thor and him then you can come on missions with us." You took a second thinking it over before you looked back to her smiling " alright. But i want to fight Steve first. I have a better chance at beating him then Thor." You looked up to Steve " plus it would be a good warm up" Steve laughed moving as him and Thor traded places. 

You both stood in front of each other waiting for nat to give the signal. She yelled go and you both charged at each other. He went to punch you but you easily dropped down slipping in between his legs before turning to throw a kick to the back of his head. He easily blocked it grabbing your ankle and flipping you on to the ground.  
You yanked your leg back while kicking out the other laying out a cheap shot, but he blocked. You stood as he moved back, waiting on his next move. He charged again and you let him come close. He threw punch after punch, which you blocked looking for the right time to strike. Just as he let of a big right hook you dropped down swiping his legs out from under him. Quickly you jumped up moving you restrain him finding the right way to down play his super strength. Quickly as he sat up you moved wrapping your right leg around his throat, using your right arm to cover his eyes and your left to hold your let in place as your other leg laid against his back ready to try and block his movements. With you still choking him he stood leaning back trying to get you off but you used your left leg to keep your self up as he sat his arms wrapped around your leg trying to pry them of.  
After a minute without air his movements started to slow and you looked to Natasha unsure if you should let go. She nodded and instantly you let go catching his his head and setting down as he was now unconscious. You panicked slapping him hard across the face which caused him to gasp, his eyes snapping open.  
"Well looks like thats her win" nat said as Steve stood grabbing two bottles of water, throwing one to you " nice moves" he said moving back up stairs getting ready to watch your battle with Thor. This battle should be easy. He put down the hammer and moved towards you. You looked to the hammer on the floor panicking " wait" you stopped looking to nat " shouldn't I be able to fight hand to hand and weapon to weapon?" Natasha looked at you for a moment before looking to Steve who just shrugged. " alright. Pick your weapons of choice" Thor didn't move leaving the hammer where it was. You stood still not moving to grab a weapon " id like to start hand to hand and pick a weapon during battle if necessary" you said trying to sound smart but Natasha could see you were up to something. She sighed nodding, as you both got into place across from each other, she yelled go and he charged at you. You dodged his attack moving closer to the hammer. He charged again but this time you charged as well. You ran quickly grabbing the hammer and hitting him before he could attack. The hit caused him to go flying across the room, leaving a large dent in the wall he hit. Everyone was frozen in shock except Clint who you could see was mimicking surprise. Thor stood staring at you with the hammer in your hand. He raised his hand signalling to Natasha that he tapped out. You walked over to him handing it over as you moved to grab your bottle of water finishing it off before anyone spoke.  
" what the fuck" tony broke the silence. " if you are worthy of holding mjölnir then you are worthy of joining the avengers" thor smiled moving to hug you.


	7. "From homeless to heiress?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second to last chapter for this part of the series.   
> It's got some smut and an Easter egg to one of my favourite movies, so  
> Leave a comment about your thoughts or let me know if you got the hint to the movie.

August 2016

"Let me get this straight. You found the winter soldier and caps missing hydra experimented girlfriend and just forgot to tell me until you needed something from me?" Fury raised his voice looking at the avengers around the table.  
Everyone stayed silent while Steve who blushed mumbled quietly " she's not my girlfriend." " I want to watch this girl fight, and have a conversation with Barnes before I decide anything" tony smirked " Jarvis show fury the footage of Valerie's training battles against Rogers and Thor from last week." While watching fury kept a straight face till she lifted Thor's hammer which made his eyebrows shoot up. " she can lift the hammer?" He looked to the group, watching them nod. "What about Barnes?"   
" he seems to be remembering rather quickly and so far there's been no accidents."  
Fury hummed thinking it over " she's in but I still want to talk to Barnes" the group nodded " thank you we will tell them the good news" Steve said standing to follow the group out of the conference room. As tony went to give Valerie the good news, Steve went to find Bucky so fury could talk to him. 

Your POV 

You were sitting in your room practically shaking when you saw Tony come into your room looking sad. He was silent moving to sit next to you on your bed " furys not so happy with your involvement with Barnes so he's willing to make sure that you don't get convicted along with him if your willing to testify against him." You tried to choke back your tears but failed miserably covering your face with your hands.   
He moved to hug you leaning in close to hug you before whispering " just kidding kid. Welcome to the avengers" you gasped looking at tony with a mixture of surprise and anger. You hit his shoulder calming down your tears " that's not funny" you said hitting him once again trying to hold in your laughter. " sorry kid just a little welcome to the team prank" he said causing you to laugh. " so what about Bucky is he on the team as well?"   
" fury wants to talk to him but I think he'll be joining the team" you nodded as he stood " alright kid I'm out of here but give me a shout about what you want for dinner and I'll order what ever you want" you nodded.

After almost half an hour of waiting you walked over to the conference room waiting.   
Before you could sit down the door opened and the three men walked out.   
Bucky turned to you smiling slightly and you moved over to him pressing your lips into his. You broke apart as fury cleared his throat looking at the two of you, " stay in line Barnes" he said turning walking away. You hugged him then opened an arm pulling Steve into the hug " and here I though I'd be long dead next to my two boys." 

Tony had ordered a feast of food that spread down the large dinning room table, even having enough for leftovers after. Through dinner everyone sat talking about all sorts of things before you all moved to the lounge to continue the conversation. As the drinks started being passed around tony had somehow roped everyone into playing a game called paranoia. " for those who haven't had the benefit to play this game here's how it goes" tony said moving everyone into a tight circle. " someone will whisper a question into your ear and you will have to answer out loud, then you will flip a coin and if it lands on tails you have to repeat the question to everyone and if it's heads then your save and you move to ask the next person" he said forming a devilish smile. " before we begin I would like to make a vote that Barnes moves away from her so we don't have to listen to their smutty remarks" rolling his eyes he moved in between Wanda and Sam. " oh and before I forget would Wanda mind looking for the lies?" She shook her head agreeing " alright then, if your caught lying you have to take a shot. Now let the game begin, nat you start pick what ever way you want."   
She smirked leaning towards you " were you and Steve ever a thing?" You blushed lightly keeping your eyes firmly on the floor " no" you answered swiftly then watched as Natasha pasted you the coin. You flipped it taking a deep breath as you moved your hand to look, " tails" you replied letting out a breath then looking to Clint next to you. Thinking for a second you leaned into him " were you and Natasha ever a thing?" He laughed shaking his head "nope." You handed him the coin watching it land on heads, laughing he repeated the question " she asked if me and nat were ever a thing" after a moment he leaned towards Wanda her eyebrows shot up and her cheeks tinted pink " no" her coin landed on tails. Wanda looked to Natasha before leaning towards Bucky with a smile plastered on her face. You watched as Bucky frowned shaking his head " no I would never" Wanda smiled handing him the coin. Flipping the coin he had gotten tails. Taking a second to think he leaned to ask Sam a question and sam burst out laughing practically falling off the couch. Quickly regaining himself he replied " yeah she sure did" he flipped the coin people waited hoping to understand his reaction.   
" tails" sam looked over to tony as he though of a question, after a minute he leans over to tony and asked his question.  
Tony without hesitation said " no " and as he flipped the coin he sighed as it said heads " he asked if I've slept with anyone in the circle" tony waisting no time leaned over to Steve. His cheeks turned a bright red, " 1938" tony handed him the coin he seemed almost to have forgotten. " tails" he let out a deep breath.  
Asking Natasha his question she answered " because at the time you needed to get out and actually get to know people that you didn't work with" flipping the coin she watched at it landed on heads " he asked why I kept trying to get him dates."   
She smirked leaning in towards you " what are Buckys biggest kinks " you blushed heavily " he doesn't have any" you said firmly. Grabbing the coin quickly you flipped it watching it land on tails, you let out a heavy breath of relief before Nat leaned back over whispering " so your the kinky one?" Ignoring her and your deep blush you leaned towards Clint " have you ever gotten married?" He laughed grabbing the coin " yes, I guess your still in the dark about that" watching the coin land on heads he responded " she asked me if I was married." Moving on to Wanda Clint moved towards her asking the question she blushed replying " how would I know" before flipping the coin, tails. Taking a moment to thing she slowly leaned over towards Bucky. He blushed lightly " well I mean yeah if she'd still want to"   
Watching him hesitantly flip the coin it landed on tails. Handing the coin to Sam as he Leaned over, Sam's eyebrows lifted slightly before he shrugged " Natasha "   
He flipped the coin watching it land on tails. Smirking almost instantly sam leaning into Tony's ear whispering his question " hypothetically I'd say Bruce" Sam laughed passing the coin to tony finally stopping only to start back up when it landed on heads. Tony sighed " he asked me, if I was gay who I'd be into."   
Quickly trying to chance the subject as mostly everyone laughed he leaned over to cap whispering to him. Steve's smirk died as he sat frozen, " no" he said snapping everyone's attention back to the game. Tony looked to Wanda who looked at Steve " he's telling the truth" she lied as tony passed him the coin. Flipping the coin he looked down at his hand for a second before moving it to see the coin, Heads. " I asked the cap if he had a crush on Valerie" everyone was quiet for a second as the silence grew more and more tense. " I'm asked out" Clint broke the silence as everyone else agreed standing moving towards their rooms. 

"Well that was intense " Bucky said falling on the bed next to you. " yeah but it was fun. Even if Natasha was grilling me" he hummed " yeah Wanda wasn't so easygoing either" you chuckled lightly " those two are up to something" he hummed in agreement. Pressing your back into his chest you closed your eyes waiting for the nightmares to run rampant. 

You woke up to the sound of James yelling as he flailed violently. You put you hands on his face stroking his cheeks with your thumbs softly but he jerked awake at the touch and rolled out of the bed. You moved to turn on the lights stopping when you looked back to James. Looking at him you knew instantly this was the soldier, he stood breathing heavy looking around the room for a threat of some kind before he marched out of the room and down the hall. Following him you watched him stop in the middle of the room and turn towards you. " soldier?" He stiffened charging towards you with unbelievable speed, grabbing your neck he threw you into the closest wall. You fought to stay awake as your vision faded in and out as you saw him kneeling over you.   
" what are you" he growled leaning in closer. " you know me, just calm down your not with hydra anym-" he grabbed your neck tightening his grip slowly " but you are hydra." You shook your head tapping his arm trying to get him to let go. His grip tightened more and your vision began to go black. You thought he was going to crush your throat but someone had tackled him moving him away. It was dark and as. You fought your breath you could hear the struggling grunts as they fought for control.   
As you finally sat up you could see Steve pinning down the soldiers arm while the soldier used his other arm to strangle Steve. You coughed trying to speak finally getting out a weakened voice " Jarvis, wake them up" you said before you flew into a coughing fit. Within the minute tony and Nat came rushing into help as Steve's face had turned blue. You watched holding your throat hiding the bruises you could tell had already become visible, but you felt a hand on your shoulder that caused you to jump, turning you saw Clint who picked you up and walked you back to your room. He put you down on the bed rushing out without a word and Steve returned with an ice pack and a bottle of water " here" he said handing you the bottle first.   
You downed it quickly then leaned back as he put the ice pack over your throat. " he's back now, although he flew into a fit of rage punching holes into the walls and flipping shit over before he just collapsed and started crying." You sat up quickly but he pushed you back down " I need to see him" your voice raspy and dry. Steve shook his head " he passed out from lack of air while he was crying. He's fine! But I think you should give him some room for a few days" you slowly moved to sit up walking to the bathroom mirror. Your throat was just black and blue except for the outlines of his hand which were lighter in colour making it all the more visible. There was a small gash on your forehead from being thrown into the wall. He moved to stand behind you looking at each other through the mirror " it wasn't his fault" you said coughing lightly but He shook his head " I don't blame him and you can't blame yourself!" He said his voice raising slightly. " I don't, but it's not his fault either" you said moving back to the bed and putting the ice pack back on. " you can go Steve I'll be fine" you turned to lay away from him. You could practically see the hurt on his face as he left, but you needed to be alone. 

In the morning you had gotten dressed making sure to wrap a scarf around your neck to hid the bruises as you snuck out of the tower. You had walked to the small café that you frequented when you lived on the streets. The woman who owned it was fairly old and only had her daughter daisy to help run the café. Finally coming up to it you wandered in seeing the young woman at the counter. Waiting in the short line she finally made Eye contact with you smiling as she recognized you. "Jamie you look great! She said moving around the counter to give you a hug. Laughing you thanked her as she pulled away keeping at arms length. " what happened to you we thought you went missing" she said giving another glance at your clothing, smiling you replied  
" yeah I got taken in by tony stark and was living with him for a while before I got my memories back" she cheered lightly " how did you pull that off, from homeless to heiress?" You laughed shaking your head " turns out I used to know captain America... before he went into the ice and my real name is Valerie " she gasped her smile turning to a look of confusion " yeah that's confidential sorry" she smiles again moving to grab you one of your favourite biscuits. She gestures you to come behind the counter so you could talk as she helped the costumer still in line. " where's gran?"   
Daisy tensed up turning to look at you " she passed six months ago." you gasped  
" oh god daisy I'm so sorry I had no idea" she smiled sadly " it's alright it was her time. Plus she'd be happy to know you found yourself and aren't in trouble" you smiled back. " I'd better get going before the team sends the jets looking for me" she laughed at that " well I hope you are happy, don't forget your always welcome here" you hugged her once more before you moved from behind the counter and headed to the door. " wait jam- Valerie!" You turned to look at her " my mother really loved you like one of her own and I see you as my sister so if you ever need anyone to talk to I'm still here" you smiled thanking her and you took a step backwards before turning to walk out, but bumped into a man. You tripped falling forwards but he caught you pulling you back up. You stood thanking him unaware your scarf had fallen off till you saw his wide eyes looking at the bruises. you covered your throat quickly ducking down grabbing the scarf and wrapping around you before rushing out the door just catching a glance at Daisy's worried stare. 

You rushed back to the tower trying to get back to your room unnoticed. Successfully you closed the door to your room unseen allowing you to curl up on your bathroom floor and cry without interruption. After what felt like hours you stripped down taking a hot shower trying to hid your puffy eyes from everyone.   
Finishing your shower and drying off you wrapped your towel and opened the door heading into your room not surprised to see Nat sitting on your bed waiting. " tony just had to deal with a woman down stairs claiming to be your friend who was worried for your safety" you sighed. " my scarf fell off" you replied flatly grabbing some sweat pants and one of Buckys shirts going back into the bathroom to change. " she's still downstairs and won't leave till she sees you. Tony was going to call the police but I told him to wait" you came back out now clothed looking at Nat as you walked out to the elevator remembering to grab the scarf and head downstairs with nat in tow.   
Before the doors even open you can hear her fighting the the security.   
You step out of the elevator and she's already past the guards and hounding you with questions. You put a hand on her mouth " one at a time" she nods removing your hand she grabs the scarf tugging at it to look at the bruises " who did this to you"   
" my fiancé" her eyebrows shoot up. She looks to Natasha " your the avengers, why don't you help her instead of keep her locked up here" Natasha leans into my ear whispering " you can't tell her about Barnes so figure it out" you nod.   
" look he was in the war and has extremely bad PTSD he lashes out in his sleep"   
She can see through the lie and waits " ok fine. It's a little more complicated then that but i can't tell you, it's classified" she shakes her head. " just take care of her" she said pointing to Nat " I have to go back to the shop" she hugged me before leaving.   
You moved back up to your room avoiding everyone and locked the door.  
You grabbed your makeup bag with what little makeup you had, grabbing your liquid foundation. You lather it onto your throat painting it on then adding powered cover up  
You fixed your messy bun, looking into the mirror. Feeling that you looked acceptable enough to play the part of just waking up you left to the kitchen. It was quiet and everyone looked dead from the last nights events, especially Steve. Steve looked at you confused but said nothing. " hay kid, how you feeling?" Tony said lifting his head from his cup of coffee, you smiled lightly " I'm fine" you grab a cup of coffee and move towards Steve " spill it were is he" you stood looking up at him " Val I don't think it's such a good idea, he had a pretty bad memory and he won't talk about it" you sighed leaving making your way to the training rooms, finding nothing.   
Your next bet was Steve's room and you were right. He was curled up on the couch in the dark zoned out. You turned on the light and moved to sit next to him. He looked at you for a moment before returning his gaze to the wall " you shouldn't be near me, I'll just end up hurting you" you grabbed his face with your hands, turning it towards you. " look you didn't hurt me, you didn't hurt anyone" he looked down to your neck then looked back to you. He stood walking away leaving you on the couch before returning. Sitting quickly he used his right hand to take a wash cloth to your throat. You struggled away from him but his left arm stayed at his side. " it wasn't you" he scoffed " i can't be near you. I can't hurt you anymore then I already have" you moved to speak again but he stopped you. " I'm a monster" you grabbed a fist full of his hair and pulled him into a kiss. He pulled away " plea-" you put a hand on each side of his face " I love you, I loved you then and I love who you've become" you kiss him again and this time he leans into it. He puts his hand on your hip pulling you up on to his lap. You pulled away grabbing the his metal arm from his side and pushing it up against your Breast. He tugged lightly but you held the arm in place " if you don't forget about what happened I will walk away right now" and with that he was picking you up and carrying you to the bedroom. Of course neither of you in that moment remembered that you were in Steve's room, not your own. 

You weren't sure how long you both had been asleep but looking out the window you saw the sun just beginning to set. Sitting up you looked over Bucky to the clock, it was just a little over seven. You sighted dropping back down to lazy to get up. Bucky snaked his arm around your waist and pulled you towards him as he nuzzled his face into your neck. You closed your eyes yawning as you turned your head resting your chin on the top of his head. You heard tussling sounds from behind the door and watched as the light turned on from the crack under the door. Before you could cover your bare chest with a blanket the door opened are you were looking at Steve.   
You yelped sitting up quickly covering yourself with the blanket as Steve closed the door with wide eyes. From your movements Bucky turned over grabbing the knife he had under the pillow aiming it while he looked around for an intruder. " what's wrong?" He asked looking to your face frozen with horror. " He came in" his eyebrows raised " and I wasn't wearing a shirt" he looked confused looking to the door before realizing what you had meant " oh " his face cracked into a smile " sorry Stevie" he yelled getting up and gathering up our clothes. Finally opening the door you saw Steve sitting on the couch his hands covering his face. " sorry" you said crossing your arms over your chest. " he looked up at me and Bucky his face still horrified from what he had seen. " in my bed!?" You looked to Bucky who was equally red with embarrassment.   
" we got carried away." Steve stood " Jesus Barnes you came in here to hide from her not sleep with her in my bed and don't even get me started on the crushed and dented wood handprint in my headboard " he yelled " I'm going to sleep on the couch you get out and take my sheets with you" sighing he dropped back down on the couch dry washing his face. You both scurried out towards the lounge leaving him alone.   
Walking into the lounge you both went to sit with Tony, Wanda, Nat and Clint. " don't bother Steve for a while" Barnes moved to grab a drink. " what did you do?" Tony and Clint said in unison.   
" we fell asleep in his bed... naked" Tony spit his drink out, looking at you and Bucky shocked before he burst out laughing Clint soon joined him and Wanda along with Natasha just looked unimpressed. " holy shit I can't breath" Tony said leaning downwards as he still laughed. You sat there next to Bucky your face bright red along with his. " wow that's pretty low Barnes" Clint joked and Tony finally calmed down " ill get Jarvis to get his bed cleaned" you coughed " he's going to need a new bed" Bucky looked down in embarrassment as tony burst out laughing once again. " what were you doing? Gymnastics!?" He gasped out. " I just grabbed the head board a little hard." Tony pulled out his phone typing for a second before he held the phone up as he called Steve. " hay there I have Barnes here and he said that you need a new bed" tony kept his voice flat. " can I have a look at the damage?" You heard the grumbling as Steve sighed " sure" and then tony projected the image of the bed. The large crushed wood in the shape of a hand print on the top. He nodded " yeah I'll order a new one and for you he said hanging up the phone and pointing to you. " do I need to order another one with a metal frame instead?" You blushed as Bucky nodded. " oh that was great" tony sighed leaning back with a smile on his face " you've streaked his innocence" Bucky snorted as he got up to leave the room " that punks not very innocent" you chuckled getting up following him back to your room to shower.


	8. Till the end of the line

Still august 2016

 

Buckys dreams had been bad practically every night, where he would either wake up as the soldier or cry for hours. He wouldn't talk about it to you or Steve and that only made you more worried. The team was off doing a mission so you were left to sit it out with Bucky till they made sure that he was mission ready. 

Most of the day he slept and then stayed up all night so if the soldier decided to come out I'd be ready. You didn't argue seeing that it wasn't up for discussion and just nodded. The team was only meant to be gone for two days but after the incident they stayed to help with the clean up. 

Steve had ordered that everyone move from the tower to the new avengers base. You were to meet up with everyone tomorrow and so you spent your last day packing up and getting ready to leave. 

You were making yourself lunch when you heard a loud crashing sound from up stairs. You ran to the elevator hitting the up button furiously, " it appears that mr. Barnes is having an episode and is looking for something." He said as the elevator moved upwards and stopped at the right level " ok lock down the floor and send out a message to the team if I can't subdue him. And before you open the doors where is he?" There was a quick pause before he spoke up " he seems to be headed for the elevator now" you let out a shaky breath before the doors opened and you charged out towards him. He swung out at you with his metal fist but you dodged " it was just a dream. Your ok. You gotta come back to me here James" he growled moving forward to attack you but you dodged kicking at his head. He grabbed your ankle pulling it making you fall towards him. He caught you by your throat and began to choke you. You brought your legs up around his arm and neck pushing him away but he just lifted his arm higher before throwing it towards the ground. You fell laying on the floor quickly swiping at his feel tripping him. He took a step back and kicked out aiming for your head. " ok game over." You said running forward jumping up kicking the wall to raise you higher as you grabbed him swinging to his back and wrapping your leg around his neck grabbing your ankle then throwing your weight back causing him to fall back on top of you. You scrambled out from under him as he got up seeing an opening you grabbed a handful of his hair and smashing his head against the wall.  
He was out cold his body limp on the floor. You quickly caught your breath rushing off to Tony's lab for a pair of reinforced handcuffs. When you came back he had woken up and pushed himself against the wall holding his head. You took that as a sign and moved towards him. He looked at you guilty for what had happened, as he reached out pulling you closer to examine for injuries. " did I hurt you?" You shook your head  
" you went out pretty quickly" he nodded " let's finish packing up and head out" you nodded moving back to the kitchen to clean what you could assume to be a very burnt grilled cheese. 

The flight was quick and you were met with the team already there. Steve lead you and Bucky to your room letting you drop off your stuff before giving us both a tour of the base. All the bedrooms were on the top floor leaving the second for the kitchen, lounge and joint bar. The first floor for the training rooms and meeting room with all our stuff for missions. Just like before your room was next to Steve and now the other was for Natasha instead of Bucky who was just sharing with you. Each room instead of being like a small apartment was just the bedroom with a connected private bathroom. 

You moved all your stuff out of the few boxes you packed and into the room, as did Bucky. You finished first making your way to Wandas room. It was plain but still personalized and elegant The same for Natasha's room. Vision called everyone down to the meeting room where tony and the Secretary of State waited. You went down sitting in between Steve and Bucky with Natasha and Rhodes infront of him. Across the table was sam, vision and Wanda. " five years ago I had a heart attack he said moving his arms as if he was swinging a golf club. " I dropped right in the middle of my back swing. Turns out it was the best round of my life because after thirteen hours of surgery and a triple bypass. I found something forty years in the army never taught me... perspective " he paused looking around the room "the World owes the avengers an unpayable debt. You have fought for us. Protected us and risked your life's. But while a great many people see you as heroes, there are some who would prefer the Word vigilantes." Natasha leans forward " and what word would you use Mr. Secretary." Leaning back again "how about dangerous. What would you call a group of US-based enhanced individuals who routinely ignore borders and inflict their will, Wherever they choose and who frankly seem unconcerned with what they leave behind." He moved to the side and a screen began to show videos. " New York" he said as videos of the attack played, Rhodes looked back towards us for a moment before returning his attention back to the screen. " Washington D.C" the secretary said watching the video of thehelicarriers falling and wrecking havoc. You practically felt James tense up " sokovia" The screen showed the city flying and the buildings collapsing while you heard screaming in the background. " Lagos" video of the building explosion and people dead in the streets " ok that's enough" Steve said.  
" In the last four years you've operated with unlimited power and no supervision. That's a decision that governments of the world can no longer tolerate. But I think we have a solution." the secretary moved back to the front of the table dropping down a large book sliding it towards Wanda " the sokovia accords. Approved by a hundred and seventeen countries which states that the avengers will no longer be a private organization. Instead you will operate under the solution of the United States panel only when and if that panel deems it necessary." He walked around the table slowly. You looked to Bucky grabbing his hand from under the table squeezing it lightly " The avengers were formed to make the world a safer place I feel that we've done that" Steve said looking away from the secretary " tell me Captain do you know where Thor and banner are right now?" Steve looked up to the secretary " if I missed placed just a couple of thirty ton nukes you could bet there would be consequences" he moved back to the front of the table. "Compromise and reassurance that's how the world works. believe me this is the middle ground" he pointed to the book which had made it all the way around the table. " there are contingencies " Rhodey spoke up " three days from now see you and meet in Vienna to ratify the accords. So talk it over" he started towards the door " and if we come to a decision you don't like?" Natasha asked Smoothly, smiling slightly " then you will retire" her smile dropped.

You moved to the kitchen sitting at the table with Steve who was reading the accords while Rhodey and Sam fought. Tony who was sitting in a chair against the wall had his hand over his face looking about ready to shoot someone with vision and Wanda next to him. You zoned both men out looking towards Wanda as she played with the rings on her fingers. " I have an equation" vision cut them off snapping you back into reality. " oh this will clear it up" Sam said looking to the android.  
"in the eight years since Mr. Stark announced himself as Iron Man The number of known enhanced persons has has grown exponentially. During the same period The number of world ending events has risen at a commencing rate."  
" are you saying that it's our fault?" Steve asked flatly. " I'm say that there may be a causality." He paused " our very strength invites challenge. Challenge insights conflict. Conflict breeds catastrophe. Oversight, oversight is an idea that should not be dismissed." " tony? Your being uncharacteristically quiet" Natasha spoke up  
" that's because he alreadymade up his mind" Steve let out.  
" boy you know me so well." Tony said as he sat up rubbing his head lightly.  
He walked to the counter putting his phone down as a projection of a young boy came up. " oh that is Charles Spencer by the way. Great kid, Computer engineering degree, three point six GPA and a floor level gig at an Intel plant for the fall. But first he wanted to put a few miles on his soul before he parked it behind a desk. He wanted to see the world maybe Be of service. He didn't want to go to Vegas or Fort Lauderdale which is what I would do, he didn't go to Paris or Amsterdam. No he wanted to spend his summer helping build sustainable houses for the poor guess where sokovia!" He snapped out the last word. The room was silent for a moment as everyone took it in. "I suppose hewanted to make a difference but we won't know because we dropped a building on him while we were kickin ass." He took and Advil and washed it down with coffee " there's no decision making process here. We need to be put in check whatever form that takes I'm game. If we can except limitations and her boundaryless then we are no better than the bad guys."  
" tony if somebody dies on your watch you don't give up." Steve let it but tony quickly shot out " Who said we're giving up?"  
"we are for not taking responsibility for our actions. This document just shifts the blame" Steve just your to the book. " i'm sorry Steve but that is dangerously arrogant. This is the United Nations were talking about it's not the world Security Council it's not Shield it's not Hydra"  
" not but it's run by people with agendas and agendas change"  
" that's good. That's why am here when I realized what my weapons we're capable of in the wrong hands I shut it down and stopped manufacturing."  
" tony" Steve shifted in his seat " you chose to do that, if we sign this we surrender our right to choose. What is this panel chooses to send her somewhere we don't want to go what if there somewhere we need to go and they don't let us"  
" if we don't do this now, it's going to be done to us later. that's the fact and that won't be pretty."  
" are you saying that their going to come for us?" Wanda asked looking to both men.  
" we would protect you" vision said looking to her. " maybe Tony's right. If we all have one hand on the wheel we can still steer it" Natasha paused " look we've made some very public mistakes and we need to win their trust back"  
" sorry did I miss here you are you actually agreeing with me?" Tony leaned down smirking slightly. She shook her head "oh I want to take it back now"  
" no no no you can't retract it. thank you"  
Steves phone buzzed and you watched his face fall as he quickly stood " I have to go" he left. You looked to Bucky, standing you followed after him stopping in front of him at the bottom of the stairs. He reached out hugging you as he let his silent sob out.  
" Peggy's gone" he said over your shoulder and you squeezed him tighter " oh god Steve I'm so sorry." He nodded.

You Steve, Bucky and Sam flew out to London not long later for Peggy's funeral.  
The church was large and filled to the brim with people. At the front lay her casket with a large picture that read Margaret " Peggy" carter.  
A young woman who claimed to be Peggy's niece spoke for a while.  
You had only met Peggy after Steve and Bucky were gone, she was the one who came to tell you that Steve had died. You and her spoke often sharing stories about the boys and such. It hadn't even know she was alive before Steve said she passed.  
Natasha came after asking to talk to Steve and so you and Bucky both left heading towards a near by coffee shop. 

Natasha was the only one to actually go to Vienna for the accords.  
You had slept in with Bucky next to you while you assume that everyone else had something to do. You were both woken up to the sound of the door opening and Steve and tony standing there looking confused. Before you could say anything tony threw his phone on to the bed showing the news about the bombing.  
"Is Natasha alright? I don't understand they have to know it wasn't him" you sat up watching the video closely. " she's fine but they don't and I don't know how long we can hold them off, no mater how much evidence we throw at them" Steve said leaving the room as stark grabbed his phone following Steve. 

Steve had been right the CIA had come and really didn't care to talk. They put him in a small cage and then drove off with everyone else in tow. Steve forced you to stay at the base with Wanda and vision since they didn't really know you existed. 

You sat in the lounge across from the kitchen pretending to read as Wanda and vision talked while cooking some 'spirit lifting spaghetti sauce' as he put it.  
They spoke for a while but you paid no mind till vision told her she couldn't leave. She had gone to her room and locked the door with a note on the wall that said do not enter! You had no clue what was going to happen to Bucky and that frightening you because they had taken him away from you again. 

The news had said that Bucky sam and Steve had escaped and you instantly went to pack what they would need. You grabbed one of Buckys suits along with one of Steve's and sams. You grabbed the suit that you knew tony had made for you and hadn't gotten around to showing you and quickly shoved it into the bag You took one of Natasha's electric bracelets and loaded lots knives and guns and ammo in the bag. " what are you doing" you jumped turning towards Wanda " they're going to need all the help they can get" you said. She looked at you grabbing the bag with her powers you watched as she opened the bag and put her suit into it zipping it back up and handing it to you. You both went back up to the lounge just as an explosion went off in the distance. Vision looked towards us " I'll go investigate" before he disappeared through the wall. You both looked out the window but you felt something behind you. Before you could even turn Wanda had used her powers to point a knife right at clints face. " guess I should have knocked" you both looked to him surprised " oh my god" Wanda said walking towards him " what are you doing here?" He walked past her pulling an arrow from his quiver " disappointing my kids" he shot two arrows directly across from each other before grabbing your hand and leading you along with Wanda. " clint, you shouldn't be here " vision said coming through the wall, you all stopped turning towards him " really? I retired for like what five minutes and it all goes to shit-"  
" please consider the consequences of your actions" he cut him off " ok they're considered." Vision crossed the arrows and was struck with electricity letting you run. 

You got into the back seat of clints car and you three drove off to pick up another guy. You had picked up the so called ant man who introduced himself as Scott. You had all managed to get a plane to Germany and from there you were asleep in the back of a van with you legs on top of a passed out Scott. 

You woke up to Clint parking the van in the air port parking lot and sat up carful not to wake Scott. Not long after a small beat up Volkswagen Beetle pulled up next to us and then Clint and Wanda got out, and greeted cap. You were about to open the door when Clint opened it from the outside. Scott jolted awake as you got out of the van moving to grab the bag trying to hold a straight face as he greeted everyone. You dropped the bag down and moved past Steve and sam to the other side of the car where Bucky casually hid. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. When you finally separated you leaned forward against the car just in time to see Scott squeeze Steve's muscles sighing. Steve looked back to you and Bucky trying to hold a straight face while you dropped your head down laughing.  
" look I wanted to say thanks for thinking of me" turning to Sam they started talking but you zoned out when Bucky wrapped his hand around your waist pulling you closer. Alarms started going off and everyone stopped listening to them " they're evacuating the airport" Bucky translated. " suit up" cap said and you quickly ran towards the bag unzipping it you tossed Wanda her suit " I really hope you boys have your toys" you smiled throwing them their suits and dragging the bag behind the van to change. " hay doll did you bring my knives or gun?" You hear and you practically smile. You zipped up your suit and grabbed the bag walking back over the the boys. You tossed his gun at him and he caught it with ease. You threw the knife and he caught that with the same grace, the blade only inches from his face. " holy shit that was cool" Scott said as you put on all your equipment. " where did this come from?" Sam said giving your outfit a once over. Your suit was similar to Natasha's. But zipped up all the way up to the neck. It was black with a slilver belt and three silver stripes that started thick and curved up your wrists then thinned out as the went up stopping just after the shoulders mimicking Buckys arm. Lastly the small red star that sat above your heart. " tony made it a while ago and never gave it to me." He laughed and you all moved out, splitting up according to our plan. 

Cap ran ahead going for the helicopter. And you stayed with Bucky and sam who were locating their jet. Sam called it in and you started running. Soon enough something jumped on to the window and climbed across it " what the hell is that?" Bucky said speeding up as the figure broke through the glass and kicked sam before blocking Buckys punch. " you have a metal arm? That is awesome dude" Sam grabbed the kid using his wings he flew forward dropping the kid. You stood with Bucky looking at each other for a second before running after sam to help.  
The kid swung from the ceiling using some form of web as a rope but before you could watch further you saw Bucky fling a large sign at him. He grabbed you pulling you against him behind the pole till he heard the kid yell " hay buddy I think you lost this." He looked over the side and saw the sign just in time to duck down covering you.  
You and Bucky got up to see that he had grounded sam and was standing on the wall telling him about some sort of ratio?  
Bucky ran towards sam blocking the kick that was aimed for him sending all them both over the ledge and down to the floor as the spider kid swung down from the ceiling perched above them. " sorry guys I've got to impress mr.stark" he shot the webbing down pinning them both to the ground. You charged at him punching him over the edge and down to the ground. Before he could make any move you flipped up kicking him in the chest and going for another "stay down spider boy." sams redwing grabbed him and flung him out the window just as he replied saying that his name was spider man. You ran over to the pair cutting the webbing as they laid there mumbling " that kid is three years away from being any kind of man." both men huffed " you couldn't have done that earlier?" Bucky said unimpressed and sam just replied with " I hate you" you lightly pushed both of them " be nice". Followed both of them as they ran out towards the jet meeting up with the rest of the team. You had gotten close till vision drew a line in the ground with the mind stone stopping everyone. "Captain Rodgers I know what you believe is right. But for the collective good you must surrender now." Tony and Rhodes dropped down Natasha and 'Spider man' along with the guy in the cat suit?  
Steve charged forward and Bucky pulled you back quickly " get into the jet, don't fight just go" you nodded catching up with the rest of the group. You ignored Buckys words going after Natasha you both fought half assed " were still friends right?" She asked as I pinned her down. "That depends on how hard you hit me" you smiled shocking her with one of her bracelets you stole from the lab. You saw Steve and Bucky running towards the jet so you quickly took after them but got hit by Rhodeys suit as he crashed into you, knocking you out. 

When you woke up you were in a cell. You sat up quickly moving to the door. " woah whoa calm down there Val" Clint said from across the hall in another cell. You turned seeing Wanda on your left and sam and Scott on your right all in identical cages. " it's called the raft. It's going to be a while you mind as well go back to sleep. You nodded moving to sit on the bed you laid back down down looking at the ceiling letting yourself drift back off. You woke to the sound of sam talking to tony " don't tell him anything" you groaned sitting back up. " ah your up perfect" tony walked up to "you your coming with me" he looked down to his watch " oh and congratulations" he smiled " and what for?" You asked looking to sam who's look just said go with it. " oh right, you don't know. Your pregnant" you stood frozen for a second " wait what?"  
"Yeah when you come in here they do all sorts of tests and well you were unconscious they found out that you were pregnant. It's surprising that they found it your barley two weeks along yet." You took a step back sitting on the bed " but hydra said that I couldn't ha-" tony laughed " well its hydra so you can't really trust them" you looked down wrapping your arms around your waist " now what?"  
" now you come back to the tower. You will be under strict watch and won't be able to leave. But at least you'll have access to medical" you nodded numb from the news. Standing walking towards the door. Tony nodded to a camera and you moved out saying goodbye to everyone before following tony out. As soon as you both got into the helicopter he sighed rubbing his face the helicopter took off and left the compound. When the raft began to sink again he looked over to you. " please don't hit me" he said you looked over to him confused " your not pregnant"  
" but the-" look I had been dosing you with this drug that mimics the symptoms and messes with the tests but other then that it does nothing. " what! How long?" Your voice rising " it was a prank I started a while ago and I thought that there might be enough of it left to trick them so here we are" you shook your head " what the actual fuck is wrong with you stark." He ignored your foul language playing with the dials "here put this on" he handed you a thick suit that was very warm. " I don't understand" he grabbed your arm standing you up in front of him. He pressed a button and then his suit came around covering him. He grabbed your hand pulling you on top of him. quickly as it shot you out of the helicopter and then you were flying gripping tightly to the outside of his suit. 

After what felt like forever you landed and he dropped you down in the snow he walked towards the jet Bucky and Steve had taken and walking inside pulling you inside. he handed you a blanket and then stuck you with a needle of some sort " sorry val but the last thing I need you is getting killed by a crazy brainwashed Russian" and with that, you were out cold. 

You woke with a start hearing a door open and you quickly sat up seeing Steve. " what happened?" You looked around at the unfamiliar room he sat a the edge of the bed " stark came and we started looking for the soldiers. Zemo got there first and put a bullet in each ones head. Started playing a video of one of the winter soldiers missions" you opened your mouth to ask why but he continued.  
" the mission was December 16th 1991. The murder of Howard and Maria Stark"  
Your eyes widened " is- is he still-"  
" NO no! Val he's still alive, he's just a little banged up" you nodded " where is he" he lead you to a medical bay. You see Bucky sitting on a cot with what is left of his metal arm wrapped up. " oh James!" You practically tackle him wrapped your arms around him as he wrapped his around you " hay doll" you kissed him " never scare me like that again." He smiled " I'll try."  
A nurse walked in talking to Steve for a second then turning to you and Bucky " we're ready for you mr. Barnes" you looked to him then to Steve then back to Bucky " ready for what?" You turned finally seeing the cryo tank " no" you looked back at him tears filling your eyes " if your going under then so am I" he shook his head " no. You made this choice without me and I'll make mine without you" he brought his hand up to wipe the tears from your cheek struggling to do so with the other side. You choked back a sob as he stood moving to hug Steve " I'll see you soon buddy" Bucky nodded turningback to you wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you in for another kiss. " I'll see you really soon doll" you nodded kissing him quickly as you moved to towards Steve watching as the doctors put him under. You turned hugging Steve crying into his chest " I'm sorry, I don't want to leave you alone again but I can't live without him" Steve nodded " it's alright Valerie, I understand. besides I won't let you stay in there for long" you smiled hugging him till they called you over.  
You stood inside leaning back onto the padding and looked to Steve smiling " till the end of the line." And the world faded into darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THAT IS. The end... for now. 
> 
> I won't be adding onto this till after infinity war comes out so it's going to be a while but i really like this story so I'm hoping to add in a few short filler fics till then. I hope you guys liked it and id love to read your opinions. 
> 
> Don't forget to check out my other fics, if you liked this then you'd probably like them.


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